mental illness

i’m fairly certain that i’ve contracted orthorexia, the latest hip-to-be-square mental disorder. i’ll let you decide by my answers to this foolproof quiz:

1. Are you spending more than three hours a day thinking about healthy food?
is whiskey healthy food?

2. Are you planning tomorrow's menu today?
yes

3. Is the virtue you feel about what you eat more important than the pleasure you receive from eating it?
i get no pleasure from eating. so yes.

4. Has the quality of your life decreased as the quality of your diet increased?
yes, but i think it’s unrelated. the quality of my life has been decreasing since childhood.

5. Have you become stricter with yourself?
self flagellation is common.

6. Does your self-esteem get a boost from eating healthy? Do you look down on others who don't eat this way?
i look down on others, but food is only one of the many reasons for this.

7. Do you skip foods you once enjoyed in order to eat the "right" foods?
i never enjoyed food.

8. Does your diet make it difficult for you to eat anywhere but at home, distancing you from friends and family.
it’s hard for them to be any further from me. psychologically, that is.

9. Do you feel guilt or self-loathing when you stray from your diet?
i never stray.

10. When you eat the way you're supposed to, do you feel in total control?
birds do obey my command. so, yes.