happy smurf day

this year will mark the fiftieth anniversary of the smurfs. smurfs, of course, are those loveable sexless creatures whose message is one of understanding, camaraderie, and love. i have a special place in my heart for these blue sentient beings due in part to hours spent watching their exploits on television and also various childhood dreams about smurfette. their lore is deep and their vocabulary flexible. i’ve even used “smurf” as a verb several times this past year, mostly in the following context: “that is fucking re-smurf-ulous. stop being such a smurf.”