i <3 lawyers

one of my few regrets is that i didn't go to law school and thus can't make statements like this:

Alarm One Inc.'s lawyers say the spankings — with a competitor's yard sign — were done in fun to build camaraderie among the sales force and that there was no intent to hurt employees.

and this:

Alarm One's lawyers say Orlando voluntarily quit after five months at the company and that she was a willing participant in the spankings. They say the practice wasn't discriminatory because supervisors spanked both male and female employees.

let me just say that being a willing participant in spanking games (i.e. spanking pictionary) does in fact build camaraderie. unless you are the one who keeps yelling, "this is gay", and, "quit spanking me with your open palm". if you don't like it, don't wear speedos to the game. jeez.